OH GOSH!

This morning I had another ultrasound, and let me tell you, I didn't have high hopes.  Last time I went in assuming all was swell and they told me that my uterus was not cooperating.  This time.... it's READY FOR BLAST-OCYSTS (haha, like ready for blast off, but blastocysts... I made a funny).  Anyway, so they were like: "yo lady, nice uterus, we will be using it for a while." (or something to that affect.) 

So I sent a text to the baby daddy and let him know and we were both excited.  YAY! 

Fast Forward a couple of hours (lots of driving and work being done during this time)
WAITING WAITING WAITING for the Fertility Clinic to call and give me medication (A LOT MORE) instructions and a date.   In approximately one week little embryos are going to make their way from their dish to my uterus and make it home for a few months.  I can't believe it!  I mean, things can still go wrong, but this is pretty exciting, so I will enjoy it. 



Me- Right before my Ultrasound



AAAAHHHH!!!!!!  So in 2012 I will be carrying a baby for someone - what's on your docket?  Oh and apparently I also have been forced to make a resolution to be a bit more tidy (agreed on by my BFF <<<click there to read her adoption journey>>> and the hubby because they are OCD and I am NOT) 

HAPPY 2012!!!!!!!!!

Delays Delays Delays

Well, the transfer didn't happen.  That doesn't mean it isn't going to happen, but it didn't.  Yet.

I went to the doctor on Dec 6th and he told me that my uterine lining was looking a little thin.  It needed to be 7-12 mm (i think) thick, and mine was only at 6.3.  So they gave me some extra estrogen and then I came back a few days later for another ultrasound.  I didn't really think anything of it and was told it was pretty common, but the extra estrogen should boost it.  So when he gave me the news that it was thinner (5mm) not thicker, I was incredibly disappointed. 

The thing is, the Intended Father is an amazing man.  And this is not his first attempt at surrogacy.  So I wanted so bad to be able to tell him his long wait was finally over and that he would be a father in just nine short months.  However, I do have high hopes, and can't wait until we can do the transfer.  He said he was anticipating this delay, but hopefully there are no more.

Anyway, I went off meds, let them all cycle out and started back on them on Dec 21.  The mid cycle ultra sound is on January 3rd.  As long as there are no issues with that, we should be transferring an embryo or two shortly after. 

On another note, because the transfer didn't happen I had plenty of time to study and take my calculus final... That I FAILED.  Thankfully though, I passed the class.  No more calculus for me.  EVER. 

I hope everyone has a wonderful Christmas and a safe and awesome start to 2012!!!

A Calculus Final or an Embryo Transfer....

So our transfer date was originally set for December 12.  Which worked ok with my schedule.  It is my work Christmas party, but I could go without.  I mean, it's easy to determine which is more important.  BUT then, the egg donor's cycle was off by a few days so they said that the transfer would be on the 15th or 16th.

I was like SCORE!  Christmas party here I come.  Until I realized that the 15th is the day of my Calculus final.  Pretty hard to take a final if you are on bed rest.  I stressed about this all morning.  And then I found out from the Intended Father that they are definitely aiming for the 15th.  UUUUGGGHHHH!

So, I called the fertility  clinic and they were super amazing.  They said that as long as I am straining my mind only and not my body, it would be fine if I took my final that evening after the embryo transfer.  YAY!  I am still waiting for the IF's approval, but that is one less stress.  Thank goodness.

The only drawback is that I have to take a Valium before the procedure.  Anyone wanna guess how awesome my grade will be after taking a Calculus final while under the Valium cloud?  We will see....

Sometimes You Feel Like a Druggie....?

So, shots have been going for about three weeks... and at this point the stomach ones (Lupron) have become second nature.  I can do them in a matter of seconds.  The needle is nothing now...

But let's discuss Delestrogen.  Those need to go intramuscular (read: in the butt).  And the needle is GIANT (see photo). I figured no big deal we are pretty much pros.  I forgot to think about things like... traveling.  And what to do if you need to give yourself a shot.  The obvious answer...

DO IT IN A BURGER KING PARKING LOT

Is that not the conclusion that YOU came to? Me neither.

So we went to San Francisco for Turkey Day and traffic was predictably terrible.  So we wound up being much later than anticipated.  At 7:30 I say to the hubby, I gotta do shots in like 30 minutes... Ok- We will stop somewhere.  So we get to Burger King AKA County Hospital and their restrooms are FOUL.  I didn't even want to wash my hands for fear of contracting a disease.  So that was out.

I go back to the car and we decide to do it in the car.  Rump up, under street lights and in a VERY public place.  Yes.  I looked like a crack head.  Because I then proceeded to whip out my other syringe and shoot up my belly with Lupron.  Quite the thrilling adventure that I hope to never repeat.

Anyway... things are on track, for the most part.  Which is swell.  A couple more weeks until the transfer as long as all goes well... I can't wait!

Wow.... 'Nuff Said

Shots.  Not really a big deal.  At this point I have had quite a bit.  Between childhood and the military, I have had many a shot....

None were given by my husband though.

Having him give me the shot on Friday was emotionally exhausting.

We prepared everything. 

Then we read all the instructions.  Multiple times.  Then we watched

videos. Multiple times.  At this point we were both drained and

 just wanted it done.

Finally, he gave me the shot.  I may or may not have yelled.  Multiple times.  (This may or may not have been videotaped).  I trusted this man so much.  Until Friday, somehow it was all gone.  He might as well have been a stranger on the street giving me a shot.

I am glad that the first one is over.  So far the second and third have been much easier.  Which is promising for our relationship.

I have only notice one side effect (I find it to be wonderful), the medication makes me very drowsy, so within 20 minutes I am out.  Good thing I am not taking it before work!

28 Steps... A Bit Much?

So, I received all of my medications... via FedEx.  It's amazing how they can deliver stuff on ice.  I can't even pack a cooler properly for an outing to the beach.  Anyway, so I get this little box and I think to myself "This isn't so bad..."

Then I opened it.

Whoa



It was like a clown car full of needles and vials and stuff.  Never ending box of drugs.  I thought it was only 2 or 3 that were coming.  So it was very surprising when I pulled SIX prescriptions out of the box.  I am not kidding when I say that I almost had an anxiety attack.

THEN, I read through the instructions for the first set of shots.  TWENTY EIGHT STEPS.  As in two less than THIRTY.  Um, excuse me?  It's going to take me an hour to give myself a shot.  I don't have this sort of time allotted in my schedule.

The next day the fertility clinic called to discuss the meds with me.  Thank goodness.  She explained that the extra ones were for later on down the road and then told me which ones to focus on.  That helped.  She also said they had a video on their website that goes through giving the shots.  Step by step.  All 28 of them.   I haven't had a chance to view this, but I will by tomorrow.

Can you believe I start meds tomorrow?  I am wondering of the side effects... I mean if you are suppressing and injecting various hormones, something is bound to happen.  I will keep you updated on Monday with photos and reports of crazy out of control hormones.

It's Official!

I am now a surrogate!  Well, as of October 26th I was.  That's when all of the contracts were signed, sealed and delivered.  That is crazy...  Next Friday, one week from today, I start taking shots.  This will be a whole new experience for me and I can't wait.  I am sure after a few days, I will be over it, but for now it seems exciting.

Getting to this point has taken a while, but I know in the end it will be worth it.  The day I got the contracts I was super excited.  But I knew that this was a HUGE life changing decision.  I mean, I am using my body to give someone else a baby!  So of course I had to reflect on it a bit.  My wise friend, ElleBee, said something that made it very easy: "This is an opportunity for you to make a difference in this jacked up world of ours.  No question about it that you should do it." That's why I love her.

I printed two copies.  Me and the hubs signed and initialled about ONE BILLION pages and sent them to our lawyer.  Now all is set.  I am ready for all this adventure has to bring.... I think. 

So next Friday I start Lupron shots.  Not sure what this does.... suppresses estrogen maybe???  That link back there says but it's still very confusing to me.  I bet in 3 months I will be an expert.  Anyway, those go into my stomach.  EVERYDAY.

Feel free to join me on this journey.  From shots to morning sickness to hand delivering a baby to the Intended Father, I have a feeling this is going to be a fun and probably bumpy ride!

Tick Tock

When I signed up for surrogacy… I had a general idea of how long it would take.  Approximately 1 year.  Well, I officially got medical clearance (saying the hubby and I are both clean and free of infection- like there was any question) last night.  So NOW we all sign contracts.  THEN shots start…. Let’s take a look at the timeline:

May 28^th- Applied with THE AGENCY

June 2^nd- Placed on website to be matched

July (beginning) – Interviewed with the Intended Father<<< LOVED him

Next day- officially matched

10 days later-ish - Met with psychiatrist and got clearance

August----waited waited waited

September 6^th- Drove to L.A. for fertility screening

Last week- Mailed Marco’s blood and urine. TWICE (Weird)

Yesterday- Got medical clearance

Today- Start birth control pills (thank goodness!)

But from here it is still going to be a bit… contracts, shots, 4-6 weeks, then implantation.  THEN nine months of incubating.  So, there is at least 11 more months left.  I am just curious as to where the 12 month estimate comes from.   So if this is something that you are interested in- I think that a better, more accurate estimate of time is 15-18 months.  Which is fine with me, but everyone should be clear on that.

Today, the IF (Intended Father) said “I am glad I have you.”  Just a great reminder that he is truly grateful and as excited as I am about getting this baby to him.

One step closer...

My birthday is right around the corner.  T minus 9 days.  I am not so thrilled about it.  I never am.  In fact, I typically cry.  Today I was talking to ElleBee about my sadness about not having done much in my life.  No real travel, still going to school and I don't have a CAREER.  The same things that I stress about every year.  And she said the best thing (not an exact quote). 

-You are doing something amazing.  You are giving up your body and social life to give someone else a baby.  That is amazing. 

It made me feel really good.  And definitely better.   But I still want to travel.

On to the surrogacy- We are almost there...  So, last night I recieved a call from the fertility clinic.... all my tests came back good.  SWEET.  The only thing we need now is for the hubby's results to come back.  After that, the shots start and 4-6 weeks later implantation happens!  That means that in 2 months I should be pregnant... for someone else! 

Now they tell you about the shots.  A lot.  Everyday.  You can't miss a shot... blah blah.  I like to think that this will be no problem.  I am fairly certain that I am wrong.  For like at least THREE months it will be minimum one shot a day. 

One is to thicken something, another is to stop something and then I forgot all the rest.  If there are more.  There's no telling really.  Okay, maybe there is and I just wasn't listening.  The fertility peeps were just talking so fast.  But they gave me lots of paperwork to sign that also have a TON of instructions.  Thank goodness I enjoy reading, because there is plenty of that to do!

On a side note: I had to mail Marco's blood and urine today for them to test.  That was a neat experience.  NOT.  I felt weird giving it to the FedEx guy.  See below.

Nice Uterus, Lady

“You have a great uterus!”  Something I am well aware of, but always good to get confirmation.  I am a surrogate.  Okay, maybe it’s a little premature for that.  I am working on becoming a surrogate.  Since May.  No one mentioned that it takes THIS long.  In the end it will be worth it.  A friend of mine recommended an agency and THE AGENCY matched me with an AMAZING Intended Father that lives many clicks away in France.  Thanks to Google Chat- for making it possible for us to talk regularly.

I know that a lot of people “frown upon” surrogacy.  They think that I am giving up my own baby or selling a baby or it’s not how God intended.  To those people I say: Bite me.  Marco and I have been so blessed.  We have A LOT of babies.  All four of those babies have changed my life incredibly.  Ali with her sweet demeanor, Kingston with his daring ways, Jaedon with his sensitive smile… and Caleb with his HUGE appetite.  Man that boy can eat.  God has given to us.  A LOT.  I want to give back.  We don’t have a lot of money to give but I do have a great uterus and I know that it will change someone’s life.

Surrogacy is a huge step and some probably wonder how I came to it.  So I will give a brief overview of the beginning… a while ago (not sure if I should say when), my best friend, ElleBee, and her husband started trying to get pregnant.  A while later it still had not happened.  Even longer after that, still no baby.  It was so difficult to understand and incredibly heartbreaking.  There were lots of tears.  She saw specialists- nothing was wrong.  He saw specialists- nothing was wrong.  They keep trying, nothing.  It makes no sense.  I joked one day saying that I would carry their baby for them, but they weren’t quite ready to take that route….  But I realized that I was, it would just be for someone else.

It may not work out in the end.  We are still waiting for blood test results and cycles need to match and lots of shots will be taken, but if all goes as planned the Intended Father will be holding his new baby by this time next year.

Side note:  Check out my dear friend, ElleBee, as she and her husband embark on the amazing journey of adoption.  Read her blog, maybe even donate a bill or two to the cause, because it turns out that adoption is pretty pricey!

Why I should be Dr. Mavis

Recently, I made the BRILLIANT decision to get off birth control.  Obviously, the hubby and I have WAY too many kids (4), so it isn't so we can reproduce.  It's because I needed to start the surrogacy progress (that's for another day.)  Anyway, about a week after getting off birth control I realized why it's so efficient...

Birth Control = Hormones in check= no desire to get naked - even to take a shower.
No birth control = Want to go at it like bunnies.  All day, everyday, anywhere.

This is how they get you, those damned pharmaceutical companies.  It's not that they are protecting you from anything.  The trick is they are keeping you from it.  It's like a sex repellent.  

But I don't want to get pregnant.  To me, this is a complete lose-lose scenario. 

Pharmaceuticals- 1
Mavis- 0